Chocolate Diet

I don't think I included anything about my 'chocolate diet' in my last, mammoth post. So I'll inform you all about it now.

Before my mass indulgence I was 9st 4lbs.

After my mass indulgence, I was 9st 11lbs.

First of all, I think it's important for you all to know that I know I'm not fat. I'm a size eight top, and a size ten in trousers. Yes I'd like my thighs to be smaller, but I know a lot of girls that do. You can't choose to have deer-legs, and if you have hips then you're bound to have thighs because otherwise it would just look weird and your trousers wouldn't fit you! However, in the last week of school and over the two week holiday, I gained half a stone due to chocolate. And anyway, obesity must start somewhere. During the last week of school, I was eating a whole entire Aero bar every dinner time, and then we obviously had Easter. I can't really do any exercise due to my medical issues (I'm now finding it hard to even walk for long periods of time without my hips seizing up), so after talking to my parents about my extreme weight gain, we decided that I shouldn't eat chocolate for a week and then limit myself afterwards. Being a vegetarian, I'm already limited to what I could eat, and this just seriously blew, but I did it anyway. I'm not into the whole business of calorie counting or checking my intake against my Guideline Daily Allowance, but there are some things that we know we shouldn't over-indulge on. The diet started on Tuesday. On Friday, my parents bought me a brownie and said I could eat it and after walking for just under one hour, ten minutes yesterday with Ashmlee Willie Winkie, which is 3675 steps and 103 calories (I only know this because of my uber cool pedometer on my newest iPod), Mother let me have some Nutella. I was given a teaspoon but the amount I put on the teaspoon was more like two tablespoons! I weighed myself this morning (Sunday) and I'm down to 9st, 6lbs so I only have 2lbs to go. I plan to start my yoga in July as well, so maybe this kind of thing can be prevented from happening in the future.

Oh, and just to add: I'm going to see Tim Minchin on May 31st in the Hay-on-Wye festival!

The First Day Of Twenty-Ten

New year, new start, or so they say...
The snow came down so quickly, and it stuck! It was a lovely start to January, but already I am plagued by self-hate and annoyance. My Pa has an amazing way of making me hate myself without even trying, and then I scare myself with the ease in which I imagine myself commiting suicide. Then I'm horrible to Mother who has an annoying voice at times, but doesn't want any harm to come to anyone, then I hate myself for being horrible to her. Pa is one of those people who was obviously bullied as a child, because he takes offence at the tiniest things and it infultraites the atmosphere, turning the room into a cold pit of awkwardness. He always chooses the living room to sulk in as well, and you have to go through it in order to go upstairs. Then the longer you go without saying anything, the harder it is to speak in his precense. He's either stuck on the computer, and then when you're talking to him, he freaks out because he's doing something. When he's not on the computer, he's slumped on the couch watching shit on the television and gets really offended when you show an interest in changing the channel.
Anyway, last years goal was to be more feminine, and I achieved that. So this year I have a few ideas... I'm going to save £2 a week, which will make £100 by Christmas, stay vegetarian, get a corset, get more confidence (because it'll enable me to be more feminine), not rush into things and have fun being young.